The perfect storm:  It’s Friday at 3:00 pm.  There is a sales meeting that you weren’t aware of and attendance is mandatory.  So, right off the bat, there is a good chance you will not be paying much attention.  Compounded by the fact that your bitter about having to attend the meeting and there is a recipe for disaster.

The above is a scenario based on a true story.  In order to look like I was paying attention, I took notes.  They weren’t meeting notes.  They were notes taken out of context and around 140 character’s long based on things that were getting said in the meeting.  Twitter notes.

All names have been changed for anonymity.

• Down sizing is different than down shifting.
• Mark seems confused.
• Dad wants to use less words.
• Graph of old-people-needs is shown.  Absent from old-people-needs is “attention.”  Attention escorts?
• Maria used parents as an example of insurance rates.  Boring was 20 minutes ago.  I am now sleeping with my eyes open.
• Cindy says something like “Girls just want to have fun.”
• I think Stan said something about how old people like to push things out.
• Cathy just #DEK.
• Younger people are faster than old people.
• Jill needs complete silence to make left hand turns.
• This meeting about old people has turned into the younger older people talk about how old they are compared to young people.
• Nintendo -> Mario -> old people can’t play video games.
• Maria is trying to get herself fired.
• Old people haven’t discovered that them talking about social networking makes them seem old.
• Maria lost Stan with “odd” question.
• Logged out for a few minutes, back in.
• Stans wants to slap Maria.
• Mark chimes in.  So far he’s managed to only sing once during this meeting.
• Disney referenced.  Surprisingly no Miley Cyrus mention.
• Attention escorts is a SMASH hit.
• Take advantage of model -> With pleasure.
• Dad wants people to enjoy community, but not on HIS deck.
• Mark admits that in his office, nobody can hear you scream.
• Hyde Park’s new motto, “Silence the complainers.”

It was Friday.  I couldn’t help it.

peace,

Jimmy